Creature Commandos Return!

Reader werehawk pointed out something that I missed in the solicitations for DC's December releases:

The Creature Commandos are coming back, along with J.A.K.E.-2--the G.I. Robot!

According to the solicitation copy for Action Comics 872, Superman finds the original Creature Commandos and their robot buddy held captive on board Brainiac's ship. This may mean that Brainiac found the WWII-era misfit heroes somewhere in outer space, which, in turn, may mean that this story, which I covered during last year's Halloween Countdown, is in continuity.

If so, then I hope writer Geoff Johns references the fact that Robert Kanigher was on board the rocket, too.

And speaking of the Halloween Countdown, I'm gearing up for another during October. So, posting is going to be light for the next two weeks as I prepare material for another 30 days of horror comics and films!

Dr. K's Halloween Countdown Presents: The End of the Creature Commandos and G. I. Robot!

As a bit of a companion piece to this entry over at the Invincible Super-Blog (as well as a follow-up to this post), here is the final appearance of both the Creature Commandos and G. I. Robot from Weird War Tales 124, also the final issue of that series:


This isn't just the final page, it's the entire story! Apparently, writer Bob Kanigher and artist Fred Carillo were given one entire page in this final issue to wrap up the stories of their creations. Obviously, this didn't sit well with the writer in particular, as he takes the opportunity to make a couple of digs in the story.

Here, the Creature Commandos get screwed in every way possible. First, they are put on trial "For rebelliously displaying signs of humanity," which is a total bullshit charge, and on top of that, they've had thousands of character witnesses speak for them at their trial, but to no avail.

The verdict also comes from a general whose name is exactly the same as the editor of this comic, which leads me to believe that Kanigher is dropping in some behind-the-scenes subtext that reveals his true feelings about the powers-that-be at DC.

However, Lt. Shrieve arrives with some new orders: the Creature Commandos, along with G. I. Robot (who seems to be thrown in for no reason), are "to man an ICBM" to blow up Hitler's Chancellory! Is manning an ICBM really a six-person job?

Turns out it isn't, as the job, like the verdict, is also bullshit, and the rocket heads into outer space rather than to Berlin.

Wait--six-person job? There were only four members of the Creature Commandos, plus G. I. Robot. So, who's the pipe-smoking man in the red jacket? According to the "Passenger List," it's "R. K."--none other than Bob Kanigher himself! Kanigher wrote some crazy-ass stuff, but he even tops himself here by riding off into space with his own creations. That's just got to be a big "screw you" to DC for cancelling the series.

Dr. K's Halloween Countdown Presents: Weird War Tales 120

The Halloween Countdown at the 100-Page Super Spectacular continues with a team-up of sorts between two of Bob Kanigher's greatest creations: G. I. Robot and The War that Time Forgot.

A cover with a giant gorilla and a robot, who shoots bullets from his fingers, fighting a pterodactyl should be the greatest work of art ever created, but this cover, by Ross Andru and Klaus Janson, just doesn't work. I think it's a combination of the garish colors and Janson's rough inking (which I normally like) that cause this cover to fail to reach true awesomeness.

On the other hand, the story inside, titled "The Monster Was a Lady," far exceeds any expectations.

G. I Robot is a Bob Kanigher creation that does not get much attention these days, unlike The Metal Men or even The War that Time Forgot, and that is unfortunate. Perhaps it's because the feature did not last very long in Weird War Tales, running just under two years. And in his last appearance, from the final issue of Weird War (124), the robot is loaded with the members of the Creature Commandos onto an ICBM that is shot into space.

G. I. Robot is J.A.K.E., which stands for "Jungle Automated Killer, Experimental" (a name that makes all other acronyms look like crap), who fought during World War II in the South Pacific, along with his robot dog named C.A.P. and an unnamed robot cat. J.A.K.E. never speaks, and much dramatic tension in his stories comes from human soldiers debating about his ability to feel.

The lead story in Weird War Tales 120 (1983), "The Monster Was a Lady," with art by the severely underrated Fred Carillo, opens with J.A.K.E. out surfing with his dog and cat, and if I just stopped there, that should be enough to blow your minds. However, I can promise you that this story only gets better.

While surfing, J.A.K.E. comes under fire from a Japanese fighter, and before he can bring the plane down with his finger-fired guns, his dog takes a shot to the back.

While C.A.P. is undergoing repairs, J.A.K.E. and his human partner, Sgt. Coker, spend some quality time together:

One of the common themes in these stories is not only J.A.K.E.'s ability to feel emotions, but also his heterosexuality. In an earlier story, for example, the Japanese build a female geisha robot "honey trap" to destroy J.A.K.E., and it almost works (and, yes, the robot is refered to as a "honey trap" in the story). Here, J.A.K.E.'s oggling of the Rita Hayworth pin-up serves as foreshadowing of events to come.

Later, J.A.K.E. and Sgt. Coker are given orders to find a Marine unit that was lost on a nearby island. The island, however, happens to be the one inhabited by the dinosaurs and other creatures of The War that Time Forgot, including a giant female gorilla.

Some strange silent communication occurs between G.I. Robot and the gorilla, and Sgt. Coker wonders why the robot didn't automatically attack, as he is programmed to do. Coker's reference to the pin-up gives a not so subtle hint why.

That's right: what ensues in between fights with dinosaurs is a love story between a giant ape and a robot--a romance that fulfills all of James Kochalka's wildest dreams (Please see my earlier post for a discussion of this particular issue).

Is there even a word to describe giant-ape-on-robot action? Would it be something like "macrosimiotechnophilia"?

However, in the final battle with a pack of T. Rexes, the romance proves short-lived.

It's doubly unfortunate that the giant ape doesn't get to play with the T. Rex's broken jawbone the way that King Kong did in a similar situation.

To add to the ambiguity about J.A.K.E.'s "feelings," the sergeant gets word that C.A.P. has recovered from his repairs, and this leads to an interesting final panel open to interpretation:

Can a robot truly cry? And if so, for whom does he shed his tear?